Oh look, another gorgeous afternoon spent breathing in incinerated pine needles because Mother Nature is apparently throwing a permanent mid-90s grunge garage concert in the atmosphere. Whatever. I love walking outside and immediately tasting ash like I'm a human ashtray at a forgotten suburban bowling alley. Truly, whatever. Whatever happened to just staying inside and playing Minesweeper until your eyes bled without needing an air quality index warning app designed by a manic depressive. Great. Awesome. Real thrill-a-minute lifestyle we engineered here, guys.